Momhood

I haven't been interested in blogging this week but felt the need to jump back in when reminded last night by Ronnie that I haven't blogged since last week. I so enjoy when he randomly checks my blog.

I should probably be a good mom and post my daughter's 2 month update right about now since she turned 2 months this past Saturday (holy shit!) but I can't because I haven't taken special 2 month pictures of her. I haven't even collected my thoughts enough to post all her milestones, weight, etc. But I will soon.

For now, let me share a bit of my life lately in momhood. (I promise it gets good, just read ;)

First I have to tell you that for the past week (weeks really) we've been in survival mode. Violet's acid reflux came back in full force last week and she screamed in pain after each feeding until she was completely hoarse. Saddest.thing.ever. The pediatrician finally decided that Violet has a milk allergy and needed to be on a special formula (Yes, I'm no longer breastfeeding. Yes, I have good reason so if you have questions, please ask.) Problem is, she HATES this new special formula. It smells like funkalicious Cheezeits that have been left out in 100 degree weather for at least 5 years and if I don't even want to smell it, how can we expect her to eat it?

We spent the past week trying to get a screaming, kicking child to choke down that nasty formula. We tried everything and Ronnie finally saved the day and found a ready made version of the formula a couple nights ago and she seems to have taken to this so much better. (Fingers crossed that I didn't just jinx it.)

Having this new formula in her and not causing her pain like her old formula, is no longer exacerbating the acid reflux and we're finally seeing signs of our happy baby being back again! And for that, I thank you 8 pound 6 oz newborn baby Jesus!

So that's that on the kid end. But in case this post wasn't long enough, I figure I could also tell you about the time (last Friday) that I had awful chills and a 104 fever so I immediately turned to Google which led me to believe I was currently in septic shock due to the IUD I had just had put in a couple days before. Surely I was going to die soon and how can I leave my 2 month old daughter without her mother?!

Ronnie couldn't take much more of my serious freak out (because he's the sane one and knew I couldn't possibly have that rare of an infection) so he took me to an emergency clinic to shut me up so they could figure out what was going on. I'm sure they laughed behind closed doors at me because I had no fever when I got there and none of the blood work indicated an infection or virus. They said I might have a viral infection and sent my ass home.

I went home feeling silly for worrying so much. Until I went to get Violet ready for bed time and I got another high fever and more chills. It continued on through Saturday when my parents finally said to bring over the baby so I wouldn't get her sick AND so I could rest.

I slept that day from about 11:30 am to oh, about 6 that night. And I never felt better in my life. I was just literally SICK and TIRED. Lack of sleep is a real killer, y'all. Or at least enough to make you feel like you're going to die.

So I'm sure you're all wondering what the hell any of this means.

Honestly, there is no point. But what I do know is being a mom is the shiz.

I've never felt stronger or more confident in my life. Somedays I feel like I literally can do anything. And you know why? Because I'm taking care of a sick infant, a sick self (most of the time), a stressed out student/fiance, a house, bills, a job and pets...and I'm kicking ass at it.

Sure my house isn't as clean as it used to be and I can barely find the energy to get dressed in the morning but I do it. I do it because I love my little girl like I've never loved before. Having her has turned my world upside down and I wouldn't have it any other way.