I love the crap out of Christmas but for once in my life, I am beyond glad it is DONE. I only feel that way because I get a lot of stress put on me by my mom and her side of the family. Even though they *act* like they aware of this fact, a lot of the time I feel that they don't realize Ronnie actually has a family too. So we had to spend time with my extended family on Christmas Eve, opened gifts on Christmas morning with my immediate family, then go to Ronnie's mom's in the afternoon, and then after that we had to go back to my Mom's cause she has her own party. Seriously? It was just too much. My family is tight knit and while I used to enjoy a lot of my time with them as a single girl, I have to move on as a (almost) married woman. Not that I completely want to get rid of them, but seriously - I'd like my own life now please! But try telling my Mom that - the queen of guilt trips.
Anywho, I know that's not the point of this blog but in saying that, I'm worried about all this wedding planning stuff with my mom. I dealt with her overbearing ways as a single girl, but I'm afraid now to completely let her in and help me with the planning. We've both dreamed of sharing that together but I just didn't think way back then, that our relationship would feel this strained at this point in my life. So yeah, lots of crazy emotions in my neck of the woods. I know I sound completely depressing but it really is stressing me out. I'm sure you may have not dealt with family like this but do you have ANY advice?
Thanks in advance to all you awesome girls! I hope your Holidays were wonderful :)
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3 comments:
hmmm I wish I had some advice for you. I can totally see my mom being the same way when it comes to wedding planning. She is already like that sometimes and I am not even engaged! For example she always brings up how expensive wedding cakes are and how she doesn't think fondant tastes good...keep in mind I have never mentioned any cake to her ever!
I think with families and weddings you have to learn to go with the flow but also put your foot down when you need to!
Oh girl let me tell you.... lol
My mom and I fought A LOT during the planning of my wedding. She had her own ideas about what she wanted and who she wanted to invite. I had to put my foot down so many times with her and no she did not like that. However if I did not I know that I would have been upset with certain thing's regarding my wedding if I just let her have her way. Now I did pick my battles and allowed some things but if they were thing's that A) I did not like B) was more her than me C) taking over the guest list then I had to say NO.
Can I ask who is paying for the wedding? If she's paying, in any way, for some reason they think they have a bigger say in the whole matter. We fought about money as well but I was the one who paid for the majority of it. Mom helped and offered to cover certain things, like the meal and the venue, but I told her that if she was seriously going to push things I did not want on me i'd just do it myself. Risky because who wants to turn down big money items being paid for but I had to have things my way lol
My mom and I have a pretty good relationship, so I may not be much help. But I'm always to give an opinion anyway, take it for what it is. :) My suggestion would be to sit down and make a list w/ your fiance about the very most important things to you. Then stand your ground on those, but if your mom has some crazy idea that doesn't really matter so much to you let her have her way. That way you get what's important to you, but she still feels like she's got input.
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