A little bit of a change..

Not even my facebook friends know about this.. but there's a big reason for my absence in the blog world or in the wedding planning word for that matter.

My dad just told us (the kids) just 3 weeks ago that his kidney's are failing due to his diabetes and he'll need to be put on dialysis soon. He went in last Friday for the first surgery which is to have the fistula inserted, which is the port for dialysis treatment (more info on that here). He was doing well but yesterday started having trouble breathing and they think he's having fluid back up and it's affecting his heart. Needless to say this is a HUGE blow to all of us and I immediately told my dad I no longer wanted a big wedding because they should instead save their money for when my dad needs to stop working, etc.. But my parents refused. They said I am their first child, first daughter and that they've dreamed of doing this for me and since they know I've always wanted a wedding, to go ahead with it. It's hard for me to even get into planning though!

First I was struggling because of my mom and the way she was acting (which turns out she'd been distant because she'd been holding my dad's "secret" inside) and now that we all know, it's hard to move on with planning. I know I should but all I do is worry for my dad. He's been my best friend and I've always been super close with him. No need to comment on this post, just please keep my dad in your prayers (if you pray), he really needs it. I need some strength too :)

Hope all is well with all of you!!!